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Expressing Your Need as a Sacred Practice

There is a certain tension when it comes to expressing our own needs. So much prejudice and outdated believes were installed in our subconscious when we were children, that it can be a challenge now to truly express what we need and be honest to ourselves and others. Sometimes we dismiss our needs as less important, or we do not communicate them clearly as we might fear rejection. However, expressing your needs and desires is vital while creating loving, truthful and supportive relationships.


You yourself are the first Being to acknowledge, accept and meet your needs.

I find this simple practise of setting up a safe space for myself to connect deeply to my Heart and listen to my true needs to be very helpful in keeping the direction of my Life clear and aligned.

  1. Set up a space where you feel safe and relaxed. You might like to cocoon under the blanket with a cup of tea, or you might like to connect with Nature and find a beautiful place outside. Whatever it is, make sure you can safely drop into yourself and relax.

  2. Close your eyes and follow your Breath. Feel your lungs open and fill up with the air and then empty in the natural cycle of your breathing. Stay here for couple of minutes and watch your breathing slowing down and deepening.

  3. Now imagine yourself surrounded by loving pink light. Focus your awareness into your Heart and let it expand, filling up with this loving energy.

  4. When you feel ready, ask yourself “What is my deepest desire connected to this situation?” And then “What do I need for my desire to be fulfilled?" Little example here: Let’s say your relationship with your partner felt rocky or unstable lately. You choose to take some time to yourself and connect to your Heart. You might feel that the deepest desire here is simply to feel deeply connected with Him/Her. So, the important question is :What do you need to feel that way?

  5. Now truly feel into that need you discovered. Acknowledge that this is something of importance to you. And embrace that need with the loving presence of pink light and your expanded Heart. Hold the space for yourself knowing that you deserve your needs to be met and fulfilled. Do not judge or dismiss your feelings. It does not matter how small or big your desire can feel -- you are here simply to witness and embrace yourself.

  6. After finishing the practise you might like to find the time and space to express your needs to someone who it might involved. Being that your partner, your friend or your boss. If that is the case, remember the loving presence you felt when you connected to your Heart and express yourself from there.


It is important to remember that no one is responsible to fulfil your needs. Expressing your needs is not the same as demanding something of someone. By expressing our Hearts we give others the chance to show up for us. However, they might choose not to depending on their own capacity and that is absolutely fine. But it is our own responsibility to find relationships and occupations where our needs can be met and therefore we feel seen and connected.

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